Cockfights and Catlikes

How’s it goin, folks.

 

So here we are at day three of this seemingly eternal voyage to Guadeloupe. Fingers crossed I will be at my new home by tomorrow—Thursday.

 

Though honestly, I can’t complain. Contrary to popular belief, American Airlines truly does not want its customers to die.

 

Sure, there are some precedents that might lead you to believe otherwise— like that date that rhymes with “Fine-in-Heaven,” for example. Or how ‘bout all those times you felt like your stomach was on the verge of implosion but couldn’t fork up the $4 USD for a stale chocolate chip cookie? Or perhaps you thought your last gasp of air would coincide 

with the fiftieth time you—between hypothermic mumbles and umbles— begged a flight attendant for a blanket, and were SHUT DOWN.

 

Yas, yas yas. These are all seemingly “legit” American Airlines life-on-the-line stories. But how close are they to the truth—actually?

 

Not close at all, folks not close at all. Take a good look into the face (read: blog) of an AA near-death survivor. Last night (insert eerie music here) myself and about ten other unsuspecting individuals were ushered off the teensy weensy plane that was headed for Guadeloupe due to a “technical failure of Engine 2.”

 

Is that freaky or what? To compensate, American Airlines gave us each queen-sized beds at the San Juan Airport BestWestern, $10 vouchers for fine dining establishments such as Subway, and a whole day of freedom to explore San Juan if we wished!

 

And explore San Juan I did.

 

For two hours.

 

My experience can be pretty much summarized by the pictures here on the blog. I met an adorable cat with tattered ears in Old San Juan that agreed to model for me. I chilled with several hundred pigeons for half an hour. I scowled/guiltily drooled at brand name stores in ye-olde colonial buildings.I looked longingly at a Cockfight stadium as I waited for the bus to take me back to the airport. And I stalked old ladies with nice hats.

 

People in P.R. are hella nice. Like, hella hella nice. And they all talk like Daddy Yankee. It’s awesome.